The Trivial Pursuit of Happiness

I have been meaning to post the letters I received from Josh while he was incarcerated but every time I unpack them and read them, I have lost most of my motivation to share some of my last memories of him. I think he deserves to be remembered, so in some small way, this may help. I received deployment orders to the Persian Gulf while on Christmas leave in 2002. My ship deployed on January 6th, 2003 while Josh was still incarcerated. Jan. 14th: Hi Sis! I hope you are having a smooth ride in all accounts. I hope you will return soon. I miss you. Thank you for helping me through the last year. Without you I would have had no one to keep me going at all. I owe you and your family all my respect and love. I am proud of you and I am glad you could organize your life and seek happiness. I have not gotten myself through my shit yet. I don't know if I can but I will try for you. I owe you that. This experience has seriously fucked me up though. I hope I don't violate probation/parole. ...

   I'm sorry. This relationship just isn't working out. You either show me page ads or self-indulgent and often whiny posts. I don't need that crap. I can feel it has become worse over time. I no longer see what's important to me, only what's important to you. And by the way, I wonder if you will ever realize just how materialistic you've become? I used to know one or two narcissists personally, now I know thousands from seeing popular posts (even though I kept changing it back to most recent) I don't care who or what is most popular, I want to see what is most RELEVANT. You thought you could control me because you offered a brief reintroduction between me and some of my friends from the past, didn't you? You aren't the only digital linchpin. There are cell phones, email, Twitter-just to name a few. You also thought you had control over me because my job requires I use Facebook, didn't you? Well, I know for a fact that there are over 50 ...